Review: Mariah Carey’s Butterfly Drink & National Donut Day / Do You Look When You Takeoff Or Land?

Junk Food Nation, it’s FINALLY FRIDAY. Let’s start this weekend off with a bang!

TODAY’S TURKEY HILL FREE COUPON WINNER:

21 LIKEs on my first Facebook contest. Better odds for all you who entered.  And today’s random winner is…. ALEX PINGLEY !!  Congrats, Alex – email me your contact info to [email protected] and I’ll get the free coupon in the mail to you! And now, for your over-the-weekend chance to win…

TODAY’S WAY TO WIN A FREE 1.5 QT OF TURKEY HILL ICE CREAM:

It’s COMMENT CONTEST TIME.  This weekend’s way to win is very simple – leave a comment below on this blog post, and I’ll select a random winner from the lot.  No Facebook or Twitter this time, and no strings attached – just a good old fashioned comment drawing.  VERY easy.

You could comment on this contest, comment on the product reviewed below, or comment on any of the topic discussed in today’s post.  Easy peasy. Winner will be announced on Monday – so go ahead and keep commenting over the weekend!

NATIONAL DONUT DAY!

Hey hey hey, Junk Food Nation, today is National Donut Day!  According to Wiki, National Donut Day “is on the first Friday of June each year, succeeding the Doughnut Day event created by The Salvation Army in 1938 to honor the men and women who served doughnuts to soldiers during World War I.” Yay patriotism and gluttony!

Today there are a BUNCH of donut deals.  Thanks to my friend Ryan @ GrubGrade.com, I now know that Dunkin’ Donuts is having a free donut with purchase of drink deal, and Krispy Kreme is just GIVING away one free donut today. Plus, locally here in DC, Shake Shack is pairing with Astro Doughnuts to provide unique concrete mixes.  YUMMY.

Incidentally, I always spell doughnut “donut.”  I do it because I am lazy, not because I do not know how to spell.  How do YOU spell it?  Are some of you lazy, like me?  I know you are…

WHEN FLYING, DO YOU WATCH WHEN YOU TAKEOFF OR LAND?

Junk Food Nation, let me ask you a question about another irrational fear of mine, piggybacking off of my “do you look when you give blood” question from a couple days ago.  I recently flew on a plane, and I always like the window seat (better to curl up and sleep).  But despite my love of the window seat, I NEVER EVER EVER, as the plane is descending, look out the window when the plane lands.  When I see the plane approaching, and it starts getting REALLY close to the ground, and you can see the other planes or trees or whatever go flying by the window as the plane is about to touch down – I look away.  I CAN’T LOOK.  I don’t know why.  Maybe the contextual sight of how fast the plane is still going when it’s landing freaks me out. Maybe the rushing pavement scares me.  I prefer to close my eyes and pretend to block out the world and wait for that inevitable thud and HUGE WHOOSH of the reverse thrusters as I hope the plane doesn’t skid.

Bizarre, I know. Because I am NOT a scared flier! I enjoy planes, don’t mind the experience at all. But the landing – I always need to retreat to some happy place to endure it.  It got me thinking – I also never look when we take off.  I prefer to take off with my eyes closed, head pressed back into the seat as the plane rushes forward.  I know many people are skiddish about takeoffs and landings – do YOU have routines you through for these moments? Neck pillows, silent prayers, clutching the arm rest like a zombie?  Let me know in the comments below. I CANNOT be the only person who does this. (But maybe I am!)

TODAY’S JUNK FOOD: Mariah Carey’s Butterfly Drink!

Yes, that’s right.  I said Mariah Carey’s Butterfly drink.  She has a drink.  I’m sure this won’t go horribly wrong.

Mariah Carey's Butterfly

Mariah Carey’s Butterfly: I am melodically inspired

I first spotted Mariah Carey’s Butterfly drink on The Impulsive Buy, and instantly knew I had to try this ridiculousness.  Let me say this: this blog post is not about Mariah Carey.  I think Mariah Carey is uber talented.  One of the greatest diva singers of our time.  And her Heartbreaker video is one of the hottest music videos I’ve ever seen:


I mean, c’mon – WHO WEARS KNIT TOPS LIKE THAT? And the Mariah-on-Mariah fight scene at the 4:00 mark?  Classic.

Anyways, I say this to admit that when it comes to Mariah Carey, I am a fan.  I don’t have her Greatest Hits downloaded or anything, but I’m not hating on HER.

But when it comes to a “melodic beverage inspired by the magic of Mariah Carey”…well, here we go:

Mariah Carey's Butterfly

Mariah Carey’s Butterfly: The Money Shot

Mariah Carey’s Butterfly was purchased at Walgreens. The cashier definitely gave me the raised eyebrow when I bought this. Well, don’t sell it in the store if you’re gonna make me feel like a creep for buying it, jerk!  Keep your judgment as I buy this Mariah Carey drink and eight boxes of Oreo cookies.  KEEP IT.

Mariah Carey's Butterfly

Mariah Carey’s Butterfly: What??

“A melodic beverage inspired by the magic of Mariah Carey.” Somebody at some branding firm actually wrote this copy.  They did.  They proofed it.  They chose the simple font. The drink is CALLED “Butterfly”? Ridiculous.

Mariah Carey's Butterfly

Mariah Carey’s Butterfly: Scan what?

This I similarly did not understand.  I already don’t ever use QR codes…and this looks NOTHING like a QR code.  Is there a chip or something embedded unseen in the ink?  Plus, why is it spelled N’Syde?  I get that it corresponds to the brand…but did someone choose to spell it this way?  Was it Lou Perlman?

Mariah Carey's Butterfly

Mariah Carey’s Butterfly: Calories and ingredients

*shudder* These ingredients are not inspiring. Sodium benzoate is not the magic of Mariah.

Mariah Carey's Butterfly

Mariah Carey’s Butterfly: TREAT YO SELF

See? Somebody wrote THIS copy too on this bottle of Mariah Carey’s Butterfly. Pamper myself with a sip?  This stuff better be good.

Mariah Carey's Butterfly

Mariah Carey’s Butterfly: Oh GAWD

I screwed the top off of this Mariah Carey’s Butterfly, and sniffed and WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO that stuff is pungent.  It smelled like gummy bears, flowers, and Fresca.  Oh no.  I fear this will be like drinking a bottle of perfume. Like, the perfume a teenage girl might wear.  I’m actually afraid.

Mariah Carey's Butterfly

Mariah Carey’s Butterfly: It’s slightly pink?

I took a drink of the slightly pink Mariah Carey’s Butterfly drink, and ….and…holy hell, this has to be one of the worst/scariest things I’ve ever consumed.  I’m sorry, Mariah.  Your voice is lovely. But this drink is not.  My face twisted up and I grimaced audibly after gulping a mouthful of this drink.

It tasted, literally, like liquid sugar-free gummy bears.  No joke.  The general gummy bear flavor, I believe, is spot on.  I say sugar-free because I got that weird blend of sugar and sucralose flavor – you know, the kind when you drink sugar-free drinks.  Which I don’t like.  At times I also caught weird floral notes – borderline soapy.

The Junk Good Gal took a sip and thought it tasted like liquid bubblegum.  Either way, this was horrible. I imagine this is what polyjuice potion tastes like.  Would not buy again. Ever.

PURCHASED AT: Walgreens

COST: $1.99

Thoughts? Please comment below or hit me up on Twitter @junkfoodguy or LIKE my Facebook Page and message me there. I also have Google+!! Let’s hang out.

Sincerely,

Junk Food Guy

Discuss - 55 Comments

  1. jann says:

    Donut, though i know the formal spelling. Personally, i don’t care to listen to, or hear anything about Mariah Carey, period. You have more guts, by far, than I.. I wait for others to buy and try, not about to spend hard gotten cash for something i probably am gonna hate. Kudos, bro..

  2. CF Sista says:

    My husband said a Mr. Yuk label needs to be put on that crappy so-called Butterfly drink. LOL Mariah needs to give it up, turn it loose!

  3. ULAL SUNS says:

    I know I’m late to the party, but honestly, I really enjoy Butterfly. I honestly wish I’d have discovered it sooner. On a related note, Go N’Syde’s other drink, 40/40, is also pretty good. A bit of tea and lemon and no Sucralose. You might like it a bit better than Butterfly.

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THE NOSH SHOW GANG

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THE IMPULSIVE BUY
Marvo knows what's on shelves before anyone. ANYONE. Our trusty leader on The Nosh Show.

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Ryan is the fast food guru. His soft dulcet tones will make you want to eat french fries, immediately.

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