Review: New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum (Redberry, Lime) & DUNKER OF THE NIGHT (meh)

Junk Food Nation, today is that most romantic day of the year, that day when you look over at your better half, gaze into their eyes, and say….IT’S NBA ALL STAR WEEKEND, AND THE CELEBRITY BASKETBALL GAME STARTS IN 10 HOURS!  WHERE’S THE NEAREST SPORTS BAR??

NBA All Star Weekend is amazing/awful for so many reasons, the first of which is that EVERYTHING is so blatantly sponsored. I know it’s not so unusual when every single highlight package on ESPN seems to be brought to you by Jack Daniels, but still, while some sponsors make sense (The Foot Locker 3-Pt Contest), others….welll, not so much.

The BBVA Compass Rising Stars Challenge? That’s not a made-up sponsor, and apparently, IT’S A BANK.  What the.  The Boost Mobile NBA D-League All-Star Game? “Makes sense that the developmental league stars would be sponsored by developmental cellphones,” sneered Sprint.  The Sears Shooting Stars Competition? Did anyone else have to check whether Sears still existed, like I did? The Taco Bell Skills Challenge? Is the skill eating Taco Bell itself?

The All-Star Game is actually on Sunday, (and I’ll be watching the #WallStar), but Saturday night is the Big Kahuna – the Slam Dunk Contest.  Now look – any basketball aficionado basically has a love hate relationship with the Slam Dunk Contest.  It used to be one of my favorite nights of the year. Must see TV.  When Vince Carter did it in 2000? One of my favorite NBA moments EVER.

Then they switched the rules: instead of just getting two-three chances to make a dunk, now you got two minutes to try over and over again.  They switched from judging to fan voting, so the whole thing was a popularity contest.  Blake Griffin winning for jumping over the hood of a car??  BS.  The whole thing was punctuated by the fact that props became all that mattered, and most of all, the stars of the NBA never did the contest.  Fear of embarrassment?  Who knows…but MJ and Kobe have won it; we’ll likely never see Durant and Lebron go head to head.  The dunk contest became/is a joke. I didn’t even watch it last year.

Still, THIS YEAR’S slate of contestants are actual names, at least, so that tingle is sort of back.  But, for those who didn’t know, there are NEW RULES AGAIN.  This year, there are two teams of three players: East (Terrence Ross, Paul George and John Wall) and West (Harrison Barnes, Damian Lillard and Ben McLemore). They’ll have a freestyle period, and do dunks like a layup line, with a team “winning” with a choice to go first/second in the “battle” round. So the first round is like the coin toss.  Hmpf. The “battle round” is basically a H2H competition where the winning team is the first to 3 head-to-head victories.  Read more about the contest here.

I have to admit, on its face, I like the changes – it’ll speed the whole thing up, reduce props, take away (hopefully) some of the overhype per dunk (choirs coming out….WHAT A SHAM BLAKE GRIFFIN).  So is there a Slam Dunk Champion at the end of the night?  Well, it’s determined by fan voting again, and it’s just a “Dunker of the Night” award, which I guess means that any dunker throughout the evening could win. So…there’s that. Can’t wait to see how the NBA botches this, but I hope these new rules make the dunk contest bearable. You know what I’ll be watching tomorrow evening.  Until then…

Today’s junk food: New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum!

New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum

New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum: The Money Shot

So, I did some digging into my blog, and found out something astounding to me: I have never, EVER, reviewed gum.  EVER. (I think).  And when I really think about it, there’s a reason. I don’t like gum.  I mean, sure it tastes fine, and I’ve chewed plenty of bubblegum in my day.  But I don’t crave it. I don’t smoke, so it’s not like I need a substitute.  I DON’T CHEW GUM.  hell, I even needed to create a whole new category for it on this blog.

But we discussed this New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum on the Nosh Show, and then I spotted it.  And I DO love Sour Patch Kids.  Sigh.  Here we go.

New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum

New Sour Patch Kids Redberry Stride Gum: The Money Shot. Redberry?

New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum

New Sour Patch Kids Redberry Stride Gum: SO MANY CHEMICALS

New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum

New Sour Patch Kids Redberry Stride Gum: Well, that’s trippy

New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum

New Sour Patch Kids Redberry Stride Gum: What’s the powder?

First of all, I think we can all agree that redberry is not a fruit, and while normally I don’t mind made up words, redberry is not comical or unique enough to get me excited.  Selfie, fauxhawk, twerk? Those are made-up words I can get behind. Redberry?  BOOO.

Anyways, New Sour Patch Kids Redberry Stride Gum tastes like I’m chewing Swedish Fish.  You know, the red gummy fish candy. When I popped the piece into my mouth, a couple chews did bring out a red Sour Patch Kid taste, in that it tasted like the red gummy candy that underlies both Swedish Fish and red SPKids.  That really sweet and tart cherry/fruit punch/REDBERRY flavor.

Main drawback? NOT SOUR.  These were not SOUR like SPKids candy.  You’d think they’d load the outside with sour sugar crystals, but no.  Tasted like the gummy candy, but not like the sour. Plus, the flavor lasted all of 1.5 minutes.  Then the flavor died, and I was left with a semi-sweet fake-sweetener tasting hunk of rubber.  See, this is why I don’t chew gum.

Next up: New Sour Patch Kids Lime Stride Gum!

New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum

New Sour Patch Kids Lime Stride Gum: The Money Shot

New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum

New Sour Patch Kids Lime Stride Gum: I don’t remember Sour Patch Kids having eyes

New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum

New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum: SUCK ON THIS

New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum

New Sour Patch Kids Stride Gum: That looks even worse than the redberry

New Sour Patch Kids Lime Stride Gum tasted like I was chewing lime Jello.  Again, a couple chews brought out the lime flavor right away, and as it crescendo-ed, I was caught between tasting that common lime-green gummy candy flavor and lime Jello. Unfortunately for me, the lime Jello flavor won out.  Very lime-y, but other than that, pretty one note. Again, NOT SOUR IN THE SLIGHTEST.

Again, the flavor died quickly. I spit this one out after a couple minutes too.  I have no idea why people chew gum.

So, all in all, I didn’t like these, but you’ll have to take that review with a grain of salt since I’m clearly a hater of gum, and especially fake-sweetener gum.  That said, the underlying flavors weren’t horrible, but they didn’t represent the flavor of Sour Patch Kids. No sour?? How could you mess that up, Stride?

PURCHASED AT: Target

COST: $1.00 each

Thoughts? Please comment below or hit me up on Twitter @junkfoodguy or LIKE my Facebook Page and message me there. I also have Google+!! Let’s hang out.

Sincerely,

Junk Food Guy

 

Discuss - 26 Comments

  1. Mike N. says:

    HA, I thought the headline read DRUNKER of the night; I was getting ready for a juicy story. 🙂

  2. Brit says:

    I used to appreciate the slam dunk contest for one reason: Nate Robinson. Ya, he may be arrogant, but he has the talent & skills to back it up.

  3. alek says:

    Thanks for saving me $ on those gums. I saw the other day in Rite Aid those and was tempted to buy these. Now I won’t be buying those unless if it is on clearance or a coupon that would make them very cheap I’ll give those a shot.

    I love sour patch kids and gum. I thought that they would hit the mark with those flavors but I was shocked that it didn’t work out.

    Stride shouldn’t had not made this flavor. Instead why cannot the company that makes sour patch kids make a bubble gum flavor?

  4. Falen says:

    1.5 mins? I’d say 30 seconds lol. I agree, the redberry flavor does taste like Swedish fish more than sour patch. If the flavor lasted longer it wouldn’t be bad. I’m disappointed in Stride. Their gum flavor usually last pretty long

  5. Person says:

    The sour patch kid gum isn’t as bad as it is described however lots of that stuff is true. For me they are ok

  6. Miss Gee says:

    I just bought the redberry (I’m a SPK fanatic!!) And now I’m wondering if I can get my money back on an open pack with 1 piece missing… The “sour” was like a flash of light. I expected more. This will def be gum for my niece and nephew– I won’t even monitor it, just chew it til it’s gone! What a waste!!

  7. mike says:

    Mine says raspberry .. Where does it day redberry?

  8. Jessika marek says:

    Why can’t you make the pack 15 pices a
    nd make the actual flavor?

  9. amanda says:

    You could review all of the different flavors of Extra Dessert Delights gums. That isn’t standard normal stuff, they have some pretty wierd flavors 🙂

  10. john says:

    This has asartame..the most deadliest suger that they put in diet soda and this gum and many more products..and it might not say it doesn’t have acid but it has asperic acid or something like that

  11. Sienna says:

    There is also a orange flavour

  12. Sienna says:

    There is also a orange flavoured one

  13. The Little Puppy says:

    All you said was true. I bought the gum with much excitement, but i was dissapointed by this tragic twist of fate. But I had to do something, so I took all the little green thingies and into my mouth they flew. Togheter, there was a bit of souriness. It was outweighted by the odd taste of a fake suggar though. The flavor was there for a few minutes longer, so it wasn’t to bad. It made for an average chew. I was content.

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