Review: Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips & Today in Crazy Ass Sports News: Ocho Slappo, Sarah Jones, and Tebow Time Once Again!

Junk Food Nation, yesterday was a banner day for crazy ass sports news!  Let’s get to it, shall we, and lead off with the fact that Chad Johnson (aka Ocho Cinco) was in court yesterday where he was to plead guilty to a probation violation.  The deal with the prosecutors would have given him community service in lieu of jail time.  And then, when asked whether he was satisfied with his attorney, Chad Johnson slapped his attorney on the ass, sending the courtroom audience into apparently fits of laughter.  The judge was having none of it, so she rejected the plea and stepped the wide receiver back.

As a former prosecutor myself, all I can do is sigh. The judge, I imagine, will reduce the sentence, as I personally think 30 days is a bit excessive for a joke.  The point the judge was trying to make, however, is well taken – the process is to be taken seriously, and it shouldn’t matter who you are; celebrities and mediocre wide receivers do not get special treatment out of fairness to the rest of us.  And Chad – you couldn’t just hold it in for TWENTY MINUTES until you got out of there?? All you had to say was “yes” and turn and walk out the door, but you HAD to do SOMETHING to elicit a reaction?  What are you, eight years old? Idiot.

Speaking of brilliant moves, remember 26-yr-old Sarah Jones, the former Bengals cheerleader turned high school educator that was fired for sleeping with a 17-year old student?  Well, her genius continues, because they ARE GETTING MARRIED.  Yep, for realz yo.  Not only is this a bad idea for SO MANY REASONS, but selfishly my gut reaction was what is this now-19-yr-old guy thinking??  “Hey let’s settle down and not have sex with hundreds of other girls while I’m in my youthful prime.” Yeah, THAT’S SMART.  Of course, this presumes that fidelity and devotion are his number one priorities when, let’s face it, Xbox and Natty Boh probably are.

And finally, how could I not mention that Tim Tebow has signed with the Patriots.  Wow.  This is either a huge mistake or another Belichick miracle.  Of course, Belichick isn’t batting 1.000 when it comes to reclamation projects; for every Randy Moss and Corey Dillon there is still Chad Johnson and Albert Haynesworth.  Let me recap some comments my friends made last night:

“Basically, the Patriots traded Wes Welker to the Broncos for Tebow.  Pretty sure Denver won that one.”

“He’s coming to save Gronkowski.” “Position wise, or in the religious sense.” “Both, since Gronkowski likes to dance with porn stars.”

“Do you think Ryan Mallett is pissed?” “Wait, Ryan Mallett’s still on the team?”

“Maybe they are just trying to get the Jets playbook?” “Well, that’s no use, Tebow didn’t KNOW the Jets playbook!” (BA-ZING!)

Anyways, good luck Tim.  I’m still a fan, especially if you cough up some turnovers to my Bills.

Today’s junk food: Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips!

Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips

Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips: The Money Shot

Saw these Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips on The Impulsive Buy first.  After having eaten and reviewed the other two Ruffles Ultimate flavors, and liking them generally, I was excited to see a third flavor added to the mix.  And I LOVE mustard on snacks!  I loved mustard on Wheat Thins, I loved mustard on Pringles and I loved mustard on Almonds.  MORE MUSTARD!  MORE MUSTARD!

Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips

Ew, no.

Of course, I am rather turned off by their suggestion of dipping these Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips into their Ruffles Ultimate BBQ sauce.  NO. I WILL NOT.  I realize that mustard and BBQ can go together, but I will not be muddying up these chips with a cheap smoke sauce, Ruffles!  How dare you.

Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips

Can we get new copy here?

Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips is dro-kick-to-the-face tangy?  Who’s writing this stuff, a high schooler? Can we get some ad-men in here, please?

Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips

16 cal per chip

Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips

“Salad Style Mustard”

Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips contain MSG, Horseradish, and “Salad Style Mustard” – which all sounds tasty to me!

Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips

Smell the tang!

When I opened the bag of these Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips, I definitely got a hint of faint mustard smell.  The chips themselves were the same structurally as the other Ruffles Ultimate brands – big thick ridges, and a much coarser chip than normal.  Perfect for holding extra flavor powder, you’d think.  Munch time!

Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips

Powder all up in there

Ruffles Ultimate Tangy Honey Mustard Potato Chips were GREAT.  If you like mustard, that is.  Marvo from the Impulsive Buy discussed this on our last Nosh Show podcast – they tasted like potato chips dipped into McDonalds Hot Mustard Sauce.  And he is so right.

The coarse chip is very crunchy, and actually makes it sort of hard to fit a lot of chips in your mouth at once.  But the flavor is on point – the mustard flavor is indeed very tangy, and had a wonderful sweet mustard flavor.  And there’s plenty of it, too – I don’t think Ruffles skimped on the flavor powder at all.  Just a nice, solid mustard taste.

But then add on top of that sweet honey mustard taste the flavor of horseradish!  It added a slight spiciness as well as that sort of bitter-mustard taste.  Gave the entire flavor some edge and brought the flavor back into tasting like actual mustard, not just mustard powder.

All in all, a really nice chip.  Chip Review has another review here.

PURCHASED AT: Giant

COST: $4.29 (not on sale)

Thoughts? Please comment below or hit me up on Twitter @junkfoodguy or LIKE my Facebook Page and message me there. Also, you can always email me at [email protected]. Let’s do this.

Sincerely,

Junk Food Guy

Discuss - 22 Comments

  1. The Pats owe Tebow nothing if they dump him before the season and if they keep him it’s just vet minimum. He’s going to be 3rd string behind Mallett and learn how to be a QB from McDaniel and Brady and maybe in a couple of years he’ll have a clue. Came across a comparison to Steve Young, who had great wheels but couldn’t pass – sat for years behind Montana on a team with a great coach. No guarantee this turns out the same way, but then again the Pats aren’t guaranteeing anything, either. Maybe it will distract everyone from the fact that they forgot to have any WRs on their team. Can he catch?

    Also: ewwww…mustard.

    • junkfoodguy says:

      @Alb. Dana: See that’s the one question *I* keep wondering – CAN HE CATCH? Because of all the people saying he can be a tight end because of his wheels and body type, no one seems to be asking about his hands! Seems to me I remember him lining up out wide a couple times and never catching one pass.

  2. nathaniel says:

    tebow is a joke, stupid move by patriots, just causes alot of attention they dont need

  3. John says:

    Hey Junk Food Guy,

    I had no idea you were a former prosecutor! How in the world did you get into this from there??

    Anyway, just wanted to let you know I’m a big fan of the blog. Love the clever writing, and blend of sports, pop, and junk food talk. Well done, sir.

    Speaking of which, what teams/sports are you a fan of??

    -John

    (Wasn’t sure how/where to ask this, since you don’t really have any contact info up on the blog, so figured I’d try here).

    • ncgirl says:

      Second this – had no idea you were a former prosecutor, now I’m curious! Love the blog!!

    • junkfoodguy says:

      @NCGirl: See my response to John :)

      This blog really was a creation out of thin air…still grinding out the law by day, even today! That’s why I miss some days of posting – usually I’m in trial!

    • junkfoodguy says:

      @John: Hey man! Glad you like the blog. Thank you so much for reading and for being a supporter.

      Re: prosecutor to now, I actually still am an attorney by day…just a food blogger by night.

      Teams I’m a fan of: I’m from upstate new york, so I’m a Bills and Sabres fan. Because my dad lived in the Bronx for a time, and because they were all I could watch on WPIX, I’ve grown up a Yankees fan. College wise, I’m a Kansas basketball fan because my cousins have ties, and NBA wise…not really a fan of anyone in particular. Maybe the Wizards since I’m here in DC.

      Keep reading and keep commenting! I love feedback

  4. Nick Rovo says:

    I’m coming around to Tebow being on the pats. Massachusetts gets cold and he’s a very good bench warmer…

  5. Kel says:

    Was the honey mustard big on the “honey”? I like McDonald’s hot mustard. I love spicy horseradish mustard (my favorite is a Swiss brand you can only get in import stores called Thomy Scharf; if you can find it you’d love it). But I don’t care for sweet in my mustard, which is frankly the only reason I didn’t buy these when I saw them in the store yesterday.

  6. Chip Review says:

    Thanks for the shout – JFG!! Great review too!

    And, if we hadn’t said it yet, great work on the NOSH SHOW! Very cool concept and gig you guys have going!!!

    @ Kel – although we may not have loved these chips as much as Junk Food Guy, it wasn’t due to the honey flavor being too sweet. We described it as “soft, and not overbearing or cloyingly sweet honey flavor, what results is a tasty honey mustard flavor.”

  7. Elisa says:

    Not long ago, I got a bag of my own from 7-11 and enjoyed it. It was a large enough size to make me happy snacking!

  8. louisa says:

    Ok it’s always advertise on tv for the last 2 months but yet the store don’t carry them why not

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