Review: Doritos Inferno & Junkfoodguy.com in 2013
Junk Food Nation, let’s get down to brass tacks. Could I use an more old-timey sounding phrase, by the way? Let’s have a real discussion here.
In 2013, I want to do more with this blog. You all have been such loyal readers, and I appreciate everyone’s comments and contributions. I’ve had guest bloggers, I’ve had companies send me stuff, I’ve been able to visit food shows, meet really awesome people – all because of this blog. But I’ll be honest – I WANT MORE.
I’ll admit – I could be quite content churning out daily blog posts to you all, sampling foods into my elder years, and compiling a online database of every single snack food, junk food, fast food out there. But when I started this venture, I had more goals in mind. And it’s time, as I pass the 1.5 year mark, to start working towards those goals.
Time has always been my enemy. Those who follow me closely on Twitter know that my day job, that of an attorney, is a worthwhile gig that puts (junk) food on the table and pays the mortgage. With the long hours I slug at work, add to that time spent with the relatives, the Junk Food Gal, working out, cooking, and nightly blogging – and I have just enough time to MAYBE catch a movie, MAYBE attend a happy hour. And that leaves NO time for this blog to grow beyond just a daily blog post.
So, starting RIGHT NOW, (time to rip the BandAid) this blog is no longer a guaranteed daily blog. I KNOW I KNOW. Stop yelling at me. I don’t like it either, but 2013 is a year of reckoning, and I had to face facts – if I wanted to work on propelling the Junk Food Guy brand to the next level, I needed time to do that.
The plan: New blog posts every Monday, Wednesday, Friday, for sure. And what happens on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and weekends? Up in the air – there are some days I might throw something up, and some days I won’t.But each week, there will be a MINIMUM of three blog posts, a MAXIMUM of seven. Got it?
How long with this reduced blogging schedule last? We’ll see. If I can get back to dailies, I will. And you’ll know when that happens.
Today’s junk food: Doritos Inferno!
Doritos Inferno was the first bag of chips I saw in Mexico that made my jaw drop. NEW DORITOS!!! WOOHOO!!! I was super excited.
I mean, WHAT could Doritos Inferno BE? When I open the bag, do my hands like on fire? When I place a chip in my mouth, does my tongue ignite?
Unsurprisingly, I got very little information from this commercial:
Doritos Inferno had the look, however. Great Doritos font with flame all over the place. And then in very simple letters, like a warning on the side of some hazardous chemical container: INFERNO. Nice.
Google Translate translates this wording on these Doritos Inferno chips as: “nixtamalized corn chips and cheese flavored sauce.” Not sure what nixtamalized means…BUT IT SOUNDS TASTY.
This says, according to Google Translate: “Enjoy her seductive spicy cheese flavor prohibited descends.” Ok, that kind of makes sense. From the commercial and this artwork to the words themselves…I have to admit, I don’t really understand the mixed motif of FIRE with quasi-goth-tribal-dark-place-evil. Not sure how the two got on the same bag.
Doritos Inferno has all the things you want…nixtamalized.
When I opened up a bag of these Doritos Inferno, I was immediately stunned by how RED all the chips were. I mean, I know some of the other flavors of Doritos I’ve eaten have been blasted with flavor powder…but these? These were CAKED with it, seemingly! Wow.
These Doritos Inferno came with a tiny salsa pack inside, which I found cute. Tasted basically like Tapatio, provided so you could squirt some moisture onto the chips if you wanted to.
I crunched into these chips, expecting spicy. Expecting the INFERNO to hit me.
But I was sorely disappointed. These Doritos Inferno chips were no Inferno – they weren’t even a little forest fire. No, these chips were hardly spicy – at all! Honestly, these just tasted like SUPER cheesy Doritos with a bit more tomato powder to add a bit more tang and savoriness.
Was there any burn? VERY slightly…if I ate several chips the little bit of spice that was present grew a little bit. Otherwise, I would say that the US-made Spicy Nacho Doritos were spicier than these. In fact, I can think of A LOT of products spicier than these. What the hell, Doritos??
The flavor packet made the overall flavor more tomatoey, and that’s it. This didn’t have any chili powder flavor, it didn’t have any wsort of exotic tomato lime flavor…it was just sort of cheesy, tomatoey, and plain. Would not buy again.
PURCHASED AT: OXXO store in Mexico
COST: about $1.50
Junk Food Guy