The Truth about Irish Whiskey Fudge
Junk Food Nation, while I was in Ireland, I knew I had to buy and bring something home for my co-workers. Courtesy office gift, right? What I came up with was this: Irish Whiskey Fudge.
Irish Whiskey Fudge – perfect right? I knew that candy for the office was the easiest thing to do, and I figured “Well, the Irish are known primarily for beer and whiskey – let’s find something that combined both!” Plus for like 3 Euro a box, I figured it was a bargain. And people always love fudge, right?
So I bought two types of whiskey fudge: Paddy’s and Jameson’s.
Here’s an admission – I’d never heard of Paddy’s Whiskey before. Maybe I’m just a dumb American, but Paddy’s was never a brand which ever crossed my path before. Jameson’s, yes. Jack Daniels, yes. Johnny Walker, yes. Paddy’s? Must be a local thing. Still, it was right next to the Jameson box, so I figured why not get two different flavors? Maybe they taste different.
Jameson’s claim to fame is that their whiskey is triple distilled, giving it a uniquely smooth taste. Hopefully their chocolatey fudge would be equally as smooth.
The boxes were both shrink wrapped, but I knew what I was expecting to find inside – chocolate fudge with a hint of whiskey taste. I should have noticed, however, the ingredients:
You know, for being Irish Whiskey Fudge, do you see something noticeably missing from the list of ingredients? COCOA. CHOCOLATE. ANYTHING OF THAT SORT. See, and I didn’t even THINK to look at the ingredients when I was purchasing this. Lesson learned (foreshadowing).
Irish Whiskey Fudge pieces from BOTH boxes looked exactly the same – gold foil wrapped around weirdly stiff and hard squarish pieces of…something. Huh, I thought. This certainly doesn’t look or FEEL like fudge. I smelled the pieces – STRONG smell of whiskey. Whoa. I just got a contact buzz. Seriously, don’t carry these while you’re driving.
Well, at least they smelled the part. I’ll just unwrap a piece, and…
GAAAAAHHHHH!!!! WHAT IS THIS!? Where’s the chocolate fudge I’ve come to know and love? Where’s the hell!
Turns out, the definition of fudge is very broad, and not just chocolate based – you’d think the Junk Food Guy would know that. Well, I didn’t . So I was distraught when I saw these pieces that looked more like caramel than anything else. Damnit. Would my co-workers like this?
I tried some Irish Whiskey Fudge and WOW. If you like whiskey, then you’ll like this – this basically tasted like a very hard but chewable sugary caramel that was LOADED with whiskey. In fact, it really didn’t taste like caramel. It tasted like whiskey and sugar that had been mixed together and shaped into cubes. The whiskey taste was so strong, there is no DOUBT this was Irish Whiskey Fudge. The texture was hard and waxy. Biting off a piece was hard, but once your teeth got the sugars working, it became malleable.
Sidenote: The Jameson’s and Paddy’s versions tasted NO DIFFERENT. I am convinced that the manufacturer just used some generic brand for both. Boo.
Anyways, my co-workers…didn’t love it. Fail. They appreciated the nice gift, but after each person had a piece, we smelled like the boozy office and people said the alcohol taste was too strong. And outside of the typical jokes that we were all getting a candy-alcohol buzz going at work, I must say they were right. This was more of a novelty than an actual enjoyable treat.
So now you know, and have been warned. Next time I go to Ireland – I won’t be buying this as a gift.
Sincerely, Junk Food Guy