As Seen in Ireland, Pt. 3 – So Close, Yet Not So Close

Junk Food Nation, let’s get back into stuff I saw in Ireland and didn’t buy, but felt was worthy of discussion.  Today are foods I saw that were close, so very close, to items we already have here in the US – but just a liiiiiiiiiiiiiittle different.

First up, Kellogg’s Krave Cereal!

I guarantee Krave Krusader is a horrible game

Kellogg’s Krave cereal first debuted in the UK and Ireland in 2010.  It came out in the US early this year to moderate success – I mean, it’s sugary cereal filled with chocolate. What’s not to like? The UK version has a milk chocolate version we don’t have.

Nutella Krave?

Chocolate Hazelnut Krave was the original flavor in the UK, which makes me wondr why it hasn’t been released here yet.  I mean, essentially sugar cereal FILLED with Nutella???  C’mon now, Kellogg’s. It can’t be that hard. Release it in the US, and start printing bucks.

Feast on this!

Kellogg’s Crunchy Nut….FEAST! Not sure what makes this a feast – maybe the serving size is the entire box? This plus the other FEAST I saw in Ireland makes me think that the Irish don’t know what the word “Feast” means.

No way! I LOVE BOWLING!

You know how cereal boxes advertise the prize inside sometimes? Or a contest or promotional that the cereal company is having? Apparently they REALLY wanted to sell the hell out of this free bowling.  Good Lord, it takes up the WHOLE FRONT OF THE BOX! Is this a huge selling point for people? Are they deciding between Crunchy Nut and say Honey Bunches of Oats, and thinking, “Well, at least I get to wear someone else’s shoes and throw and 10-lb ball with this one for an hour.”

Wait, is maple syrup specifically Canadian?

Nature Valley Granola Bars are tasty, and I like that these are just straight up Maple Syrup flavor. Not Maple Brown Sugar, not Maple and Almond, just plain Maple Syrup.  This is granola dipped in syrup.  That sounds healthy.

So, Chocolate dipped Twinkies?

Milky Way Cake Bars??? What the – individually wrapped sponge cakes filled with creamy filling covered in milk chocolate? AMAZING.  One of the things I sort of wish I bought, but the flavor is probably predictable.  And that flavor is DELICIOUSNESS.

Not sure if I need Kit Kat in this format...

Kit Kats in little Whopper-like balls?  You crazy, Ireland.  Still, is this sought after? “You know, I LOVE Kit Kats, but they’re TOO BIG. I WISH there was someway I didn’t have to bother breakin’ off a piece of that Kit Kat Bar!”

Wait, these exist in the US too???

When I first saw these, I thought, “Buffalo-style Chicken Jerky Nuggets? FOUL. Silly Ireland.” Then I found out…they exist in the United States!!!! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Ireland….you win this round. Still looks iffy.

Tooooooooooobz

Irish Pringles!  TOOBZ!  Lol.  Toobz sounds like boobs.

Wait, Hot & Spicy isn't a flavor, per se...is it?

My buddy Sean who has been living in Ireland for the past several months told me that the Irish really can’t handle spice very well.  He specifically pointed out this can of Pringles and said, “I GUARANTEE those Pringles are anything BUT Hot & Spicy.”

Awh yeah, my first interaction with the Golden Arches!

While walking in Galway, I finally spotted my first McDonald’s!!!  WOOHOOO!!! As I ran up to the window, I was searching for some crazy McDonald’s burgers that we didn’t have in the US.

And Ireland did not disappoint:

WHOA

GREAT TASTES OF AMERICA BURGERS!? Say whaaaaaaaaaa. Ridiculous.  Apparently this is a huge campaign in the UK and Ireland!  See here:

Apparently, the Great Tastes of America are: Texas BBQ, Chicago Supreme, Arizona Nacho Grande, and New York Classic.  Of course, I can only imagine what the UK thinks is synonymous with these regions.

That's so Kansas City

This link says it all.  The Texas BBQ has bacon, sticky BBQ sauce, fried onion rings, lettuce, cheese.  The Chicago Supreme has lettuce, bacon, onion, cheese, mayo, and …..spicy salsa??? On a chili chive sesame bun?

I object to these stereotypes...if you can call them that

The Arizona Nacho Grande has lettuce melted nacho cheese, tortilla chips (what), pepper jack cheese, and pepperoni (???). And the New York Classic has a chili chive sesame bun with lettuce, tomato, onion, bacon, cheese, and ketchup/mustard/mayo.

I’m not sure what the British or Irish think we’re doing over here, but I can tell you that NO one associates pepperoni with Arizona (or nachos, generally), and while putting salsa on a burger doesn’t sound bad, I’m not sure how that translates to the Windy City.  According this blog:

“It really does get across different tastes of America in different regions with highlights being the New York Classic burger with its melting taste of a deli sandwich in Brooklyn and the Arizona Nacho Grande with crunch of Nachos and salty addictive taste of the sliced pepperoni which you can imagine eating in any restaurant in Phoenix.”

This person has clearly never been to America.  For more in depth info on these Great Tastes of America, check out the McMunchings Blog here.

Thoughts? Hit me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

Discuss - 18 Comments

  1. parowpyro. says:

    phoenix is the indisputable pepperoni capital of the U.S.

  2. Dr. Stanley Goodspeed says:

    I think the New York Classic would be a great burger if it was simply topped with lox and cream cheese. Or maybe instead of a bun it was served on two slices of NY style pizza?

  3. I do wish our American McDonald’s would do a Great Tastes of the World series – would love Teriyaki Burger week & Moroccan Burger week, you know? Ooo, Lamb Burger week!

    Toobz…

  4. I want to get my hands on all this stuff, especially the Chocolate Hazelnut Krave because that sounds awesome.

    That said, the reason that you’ve never seen it in America is because hazelnut is not typically a flavor that sells well in the United States but does sell well in Britain. Studies have shown that and I’ve read in “The Emperors of Chocolate” that Mars kids (of Mars Candy Company) were so obsessed with hazelnut (they spent his childhood in boarding school in the U.K.) that they nearly drove the company out of business years ago because they kept trying to force hazelnut into the American market. Of course, it had NO success and nearly bankrupted the company. Strangely, all of them hate peanut butter too. Weirdos.

    Thus ends the useless trivia/history lesson for the day…

  5. Lindemann says:

    I would eat Milky Way Cake bars like…well, like candy. Make it happen, Mars USA!

  6. Shorneys says:

    I’m pretty sure that the Irish know what famine is, so it’s a mystery as to whence comes their idea of feast might be. Perhaps a feast is merely the lack of total and abject genocidal starvation?

    The Irish are weird. Also, @Indianapolis Eater: hazelnuts suck ass. I hate that flavor, I think it tastes rancid and stale and gross. Boo hazelnut.

  7. Albany Dana says:

    Love the chips and peppers sliding down the…ski jump(?) through a ring of fire…? They’re so hot and spicy they’re…sparkly?

    I thought Americans are the ones that are supposed to be obsessed with sweetness…and they’re slathering their granola bars with maple syrup?

    Wait – you don’t picture Chicago when you think ‘salsa’? I bet you don’t picture Des Moines when you think ‘cheesesteaks’, either.

    I thought Americas are the ones that are supposed to be obsessed with fatty cheese…and they’re slathering their burgers (and presumably shirt fronts, cuffs, shoes, tables, and laps) with melted nacho cheese AND pepper jack cheese?

    Isn’t pepperoni the fruit of the tumbleweed?

    Next time I’m in NYC I’ll see if I can find a chili chive sesame bun ANYWHERE.

    To clarify – the great tastes of America are: bacon cheeseburgers (OK, check), tortilla chips (ummm…huh?), pepperoni (by itself, not so much – on top of things it was never meant to top, yes- check), salsa (well, it is the #1 condiment, or is that a myth?), and BBQ sauce (OK, check). And chili chive sesame buns. Of course.

    I see that American marketing is alive and well there…FREE!!!!!!!!!!*

    (*with every full paying adult)

    Hu-huh…he said “Toobz”!

  8. Jen says:

    I’ve been eating the Buffalo Chcken Jerky in teh states for years – it’s quite good, and very tender. And spicy as hell, if you can believe it.

  9. McMunchings says:

    Hey, thanks for linking us.
    I totally agree about the Taste of america Burgers, I don’t know anyone who would associate pepperoni with Arizona or big red onions with NY. The closest is possible Texas with the BBQ sauce but that was not a patch on the REAL stuff BBQ I have had.

    That said it make a nice change and I did really like the Arizona burger, even if it was culturally inaccurate, the idea of proper state or country themed burgers really does appeal though.

    • junkfoodguy says:

      @McMunchings: HEY! So glad you liked the article – yours was great too! Yeah, now I have to say I’m really curious about the AZ burger – pepperoni on anything can’t be bad!

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