Kashi Zesty Salsa Pita Crisps & Yay BCSzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Junk Food Nation, last night was the BCS title game between the LSU Tigers and the Alabama Crimson Tide.  The #2 ranked Tide rolled the LSU Tigers 21-0.  Seems like a lot of offense, right?  However, if you watched the game, with the exception of a great rushing TD with 7 minutes left in the game, you probably thought what I thought: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Sure, it was a great defensive struggle with Alabama’s defense eating up the Tigers’ line, but I, like many people, watch college football for OFFENSE.  I mean, seriously.  Five field goals?  It was such a boring game, I actually stopped to YouTube this video my friend Joe sent me:

Creepy, right?  Anyways, some tweets and texts from during the game last night:

“I decided to make soup instead.”

“LSU needs to put Tebow in.”


“If I could compress the BCS Title game into pill form, I would put Lunesta and Ambien out of business.”

If you’re like me and think the BCS is stupid (that should be 99% of you), then games like this make you bitter that teams like Oklahoma State this year and Boise State in years past weren’t able to play for the title. THEY’D put up points, I’m sure of it.  0 points for LSU….are you kidding me, Les Miles!?

Fellow blogger Adam appreciates defensive performances, and I can respect that.  Check out his latest post on the FCS championship – it’s a good read.

But yes, as for me? I like big explosions and gratuitous skin in my movies, and I like offense in my college football.

Today’s junk food: Kashi Zesty Salsa Pita Chips!

The Money Shot

Kashi Zesty Salsa Pita Chips are the newest snack in the Kashi line of crackers.  These were purchased at my local Wegmans, where they sold both this and a original 7-grain flavor.  Kashi is known for being healthy healthy healthy, and they trumpet the fact that they are “passionate about good, all-natural foods.” Since I’ve been on a recent healthy junk food kick, I decided to give these a go.

TLC = Tastes Like Chips

Kashi Zesty Salsa Pita Chips are marketed on the Kashi website, like so: “We bake everything we love into our new tasty little crackers. Real food ingredients — like seven whole grains, cracked wheat berries, veggies, and natural sea salt — go into each and every crisp.”

I like how they emphasize REAL FOOD ingredients, as a jab to junk food companies like Frito-Lay that use chemicals.  Delicious, tasty, chemicals.  Mmmmmmm.

Angel bowls of salsa!

Kashi Zesty Salsa Pita Chips, why is there a flying bowl of salsa on your box?  Not only is it creepy, but…no, it’s really just creepy.  Looks like a big horsefly that would explode with salsa instead of blood if you smacked it.

Nutritious snacks...right

Satisfy snack craving AND feel good about it? Those two things can’t happen simultaneously!

Follow the dotted line

I do like the use of natural ingredients, don’t get me wrong.  You are what you eat is so true, and onions, tomatoes, peppers, cilantro, whole grains, fiber – all good stuff.  I’m still curious what makes these “zesty” though.  Zesty is not really a word that gets thrown around much.  No says, “love your shirt…it’s zesty!” Thanks, weirdo.

Kashi has its own grain?

Mixed Tocopherols for Freshness??? AH-HA!  I found a chemical, Kashi!  Your hands aren’t clean!

Oh wait, according to Wiki, Tocopherols are organic compounds that have Vitamin E activity and are fat soluble antioxidants.  Crap.

Heavily seasoned

Kashi Zesty Salsa Pita Chips, certainly do LOOK zesty!  At first glance, toasted and covered in powder!  When i put my nose over the open box…faint wheat smell.  Let’s delve further…


Red and green speckles

Each pita cracker is covered in a variety of little bits of red/orange powder and specks of green are embedded into the cracker itself.

Thick and crunchy


I popped a cracker into my mouth, and munched….hmmmm.  These Kashi Zesty Salsa Pita Chips are zesty, but not sure about the overall product.

The crunch: the whole grains and thick cracker make this snack VERY crunchy, not crispy about it.  These were not light and flaky crackers; these were definitely more hearty, like a stone-ground wheat thin.

The flavor of the cracker is definitely whole-wheaty.  I could taste the grains and the whole wheat flour as I chewed.  That part was nice.

The flavor of the zesty spice?  Ehhh…..that’s where it went a little awry for me.  The flavoring was pretty close – if I really tried to discern the spices, I could taste the tomato, the onion, the pepper, and the cilantro.  It did, indeed, have a taste that matched salsa.  But that’s the thing – these tasted like crackers dipped in salsa.  Which, to me, tastes a little weird, being so used to corn-based snacks being dipped in salsa.

Plus, the zesty flavor vanished almost immediately after chewing, giving way to the cracker.  On the whole, not a bad snack, but I will not be purchasing these again.

Thoughts? Tell me in the comments below or hit me on Twitter @junkfoodguy or on my Facebook Page.

Sincerely, Junk Food Guy

Discuss - 3 Comments

  1. Those crackers actually LOOK really good, but as with all Kashi products I’ve tried, the idea is good but the execution is awful (and extremely expensive). I’ve got a Kashi review on my site today that was a brilliant idea but turned out to be one of the worst foods I’ve ever eaten.

  2. junkfoodguy says:

    @IE – you’re so right about the idea being good, but bad execution. And the thing is, I eat a lot of junk food sure, but I’m actually a person who likes regular healthy food a lot – so there’s no reason “healthy” snacks should taste this bad!

    Loved your review of the Turtle Roll: http://www.crazyfooddude.com/2012/01/review-kashi-golean-roll-chocolate.html

    That roll definitely looked hard to ingest.

  3. Kahnfucius says:

    Was bama’s D really that good or did lsu’s O just kinda suck last night? Let’s see: a bunch of false start penalties, fumbled snaps, a bunch of the same running play that hadn’t worked any of the previous 20 they ran it, an interception thrown directly at a linebacker 5 yards away…Am I missing something?

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